Thanks! I'm glad you think it works (for the most part)! Dialogue is definitely one of the most important facets of fiction, so I like discussing it.
I find Simon stilted and slightly pretentious whenever he's uncomfortable - it happens throughout the TV series. [He may have spoken more easily for the movie, but this is set before that.] Kaylee asking him to act as the arbiter of propriety has made him uncomfortable here (which I hope shows).
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Date: 2008-06-13 02:18 am (UTC)I find Simon stilted and slightly pretentious whenever he's uncomfortable - it happens throughout the TV series. [He may have spoken more easily for the movie, but this is set before that.] Kaylee asking him to act as the arbiter of propriety has made him uncomfortable here (which I hope shows).