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Jul. 1st, 2007 10:01 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
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Title ‘sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler’
Author
skull_theatre
Rating G
Word Count 487
Prompt Free For All – Bring Out Your Dead
Characters/Pairing (if any) William the Bloody
I’ve missed every single one of you! Had to take June off – trying to get back through and read entries!
still_grrr is the best writing community on the web!
He chokes back the involuntary shudderering of his throat, the gag reflex almost doubling him over, the smell of human decay filling his nostrils, jabbing into the back of his mouth like two fingers. Swallowing the odour of this woman, this room, these bedclothes - he closes his eyes - inhaling the stench of bodily fluids and a permeating presence of some Fierce Angel of Death hovering on the edges of her existence is asking everything of him. He has been precious with himself these fifty-seven years of life and to swallow her down like this has been the most intimate relationship he has had with anyone. Ever. And she is his mother.
Her dying has been taking weeks.
He opens his eyes; the dim early evening light reflects his own mood, helpless. Night will fall, his mother will pass. He wills his stomach to settle, shakes his head, light brown curls shot through with grey falling down over his forehead. With a trembling hand, he smoothes the hair out of his eyes and enters the room. In the street below, the doctor’s hansom pulls away from the kerb, the driver shouting a quick word to the matched pair, a voice full of life and vigor. William can imagine the black-clad physician settling back into leather cushions, his bag by his booted feet, the patient already forgotten.
He bites back a small cry and moves towards the bed.
She is unconscious and he despairs at the finality of it. Not sleeping, not napping, not retreating medicinally from the pain, but unconscious. Comatose. Leaving him. And now he does let out a cry, at first involuntary, but then he falls to his knees beside the bed, his arms over her, his face buried in her neck and the tears fall and fall and fall and he is wracked. Completely. His quick mind washed empty by his tears, no thoughts of creditors or bills or bankruptcy. The pinprick feeling of failure receding, even his passion for writing forgotten.
He shrugs out of his coat, badly in need of a cleaning anyway, and lets it fall to the threadbare carpet. He crawls up into the bed like a child and remembers childhood nights of crawling in beside her, she smelled of cinnamon and cotton thread then, her skin tight on her bones, her hands strong, holding him, fingers combing through the curls she loved so much. Peace. Security and an overwhelming feeling of being loved. He weeps.
He takes her limp body into his arms, cradles her head on his shoulder. Lowers his mouth to her thinning hair, presses his lips there.
The morning will come, the sun will rise, she will be gone and he will be alone. His tears still fall and he realizes that he is crying for himself as well. For this road taken and for that dark alley he turned away from a lifetime ago.
Author
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Rating G
Word Count 487
Prompt Free For All – Bring Out Your Dead
Characters/Pairing (if any) William the Bloody
I’ve missed every single one of you! Had to take June off – trying to get back through and read entries!
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
He chokes back the involuntary shudderering of his throat, the gag reflex almost doubling him over, the smell of human decay filling his nostrils, jabbing into the back of his mouth like two fingers. Swallowing the odour of this woman, this room, these bedclothes - he closes his eyes - inhaling the stench of bodily fluids and a permeating presence of some Fierce Angel of Death hovering on the edges of her existence is asking everything of him. He has been precious with himself these fifty-seven years of life and to swallow her down like this has been the most intimate relationship he has had with anyone. Ever. And she is his mother.
Her dying has been taking weeks.
He opens his eyes; the dim early evening light reflects his own mood, helpless. Night will fall, his mother will pass. He wills his stomach to settle, shakes his head, light brown curls shot through with grey falling down over his forehead. With a trembling hand, he smoothes the hair out of his eyes and enters the room. In the street below, the doctor’s hansom pulls away from the kerb, the driver shouting a quick word to the matched pair, a voice full of life and vigor. William can imagine the black-clad physician settling back into leather cushions, his bag by his booted feet, the patient already forgotten.
He bites back a small cry and moves towards the bed.
She is unconscious and he despairs at the finality of it. Not sleeping, not napping, not retreating medicinally from the pain, but unconscious. Comatose. Leaving him. And now he does let out a cry, at first involuntary, but then he falls to his knees beside the bed, his arms over her, his face buried in her neck and the tears fall and fall and fall and he is wracked. Completely. His quick mind washed empty by his tears, no thoughts of creditors or bills or bankruptcy. The pinprick feeling of failure receding, even his passion for writing forgotten.
He shrugs out of his coat, badly in need of a cleaning anyway, and lets it fall to the threadbare carpet. He crawls up into the bed like a child and remembers childhood nights of crawling in beside her, she smelled of cinnamon and cotton thread then, her skin tight on her bones, her hands strong, holding him, fingers combing through the curls she loved so much. Peace. Security and an overwhelming feeling of being loved. He weeps.
He takes her limp body into his arms, cradles her head on his shoulder. Lowers his mouth to her thinning hair, presses his lips there.
The morning will come, the sun will rise, she will be gone and he will be alone. His tears still fall and he realizes that he is crying for himself as well. For this road taken and for that dark alley he turned away from a lifetime ago.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-01 05:34 pm (UTC)Great job. Good to see you back.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-01 06:44 pm (UTC)Nicely written though, very nice.
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Date: 2007-07-01 10:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-01 10:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-01 10:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-01 11:32 pm (UTC)XO
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Date: 2007-07-02 06:51 am (UTC);) cheers to you.
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Date: 2007-07-02 01:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-02 09:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-02 01:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-02 08:29 pm (UTC)This was so in character, so in voice, and so utterly intense. I could feel his grief and the horrible lingering death of his mother. Just fabulous.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-03 11:53 am (UTC)It was insanely difficult to take June off - I kept having to stick pins in myself to stay on task out here in the real world...while wanting to write BtVS!!! ;)
Thanks so much - I'm glad you could hear William in this. Such a poignant character. *sniff* He loved his mum!
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Date: 2007-07-07 02:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-06 10:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-07 02:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-19 11:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-19 02:23 pm (UTC)