still_grrr | 22 Gatekeeper

Title: Nerds In The Hereafter
Show: BTVS
Author: not_purrrfect
Rating: R
Word Count: 400
Prompt: 22 Gatekeeper
Pairing(if any): Warren, Jonathan
Disclaimer: It's Joss'

"Warren?" Asked Jonathan as they met in the hereafter. "Where are we?"

Warren looked at him and sneered, "Hey Short Round, We're in some odd dimension between Heaven and Hell, something Otherworldly.

It was all dark and misty and had a cold tingle sensation to the atmosphere. It kind of hurt Jonathan's delicate skin.

Jonathan said, "I don't like this."

Warren angrily countered, "What'd you expect you little pip squeak? Clouds and harps an dancing Schnauzers, dumb ass?"

"But I wasn't all that evil, I was way less bad than you. Then, Andrew just off and kills me for no reason. I just don't understand." Jonathan cried.

Warren turned on him and shouted, "Oh save your tears, I'm sick of it. Sick to death, and well I'm dead so duh! Get away from me Jonathannnnnnnnnnnnnnn I don't want you anywhere near me. I want you NOT here!"

Jonathan pressed. "But that's just it. Where is 'here'?"

An ethereal image appeared before them. It was the last person Warren ever expected to see.

"T-Tara?" Warren said barely able to speak at all.

"Yes Warren, it's me. Tara said gently not the slightest hit of anger in her sweet voice. "I want you to think about your life, and the way you have treated others. I'm the Gatekeeper of this dimension, and you need to decide where you think you belong."

"How should I know?" Warren said bitterly. "I don't really care either. I don't feel bad for anything I've done. I half expected to go straight to Hell, but I ended up in this London Fog farce, Just send me somewhere, anywhere that's not near this prissy." He said pointing at Jonathan.

"As you wish." Said Tara and clapped her hands. And Warren faded away.

"Where did you send him." Jonathan asked Tara.

"Where he asked." She said simply. "Now how about you. Where do you want to go?"

"I just want to go back and help Buffy. But I'm afraid I have no ruby slippers, and I don't think I have any wishes left either."

Tara smiled angelically at him. "You don't deserve to be dead. I'm sending you back."

"Really?" Said Jonathan surprised.

"It's what you want, right?" Tara said and clapped her hands again.

And POP! Jonathan opened his eyes and he was still laying on the seal of Danzalthar. "Huh?" he said.

And Andrew peed his pants.

The End.