Prompt 070: Firefly: Objects in Space Ficlet

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Title: Blood and Roses
Author: Alsunwunderland
Character: River
Prompt: 070 Firefly: Objects in Space: Ficlet
Rating: PG
Word Count: 200
Notes: Concrit and feedback are appreciated.

River could not find peace onboard Serenity. The constant clamor of their tangled thoughts was torture. I’ll be in my bunk-Why won’t he kiss me-It’s not proper-Too many husbands in this marriage-Ready to have a baby now. It was enough to make her head ache and her nose bleed. Their thoughts about her were worse. Crazy girl-moon brain-money was too good-she ain’t human-weapon or girl-time bomb-I’d still be at the hospital if it weren’t for-might have ta put a bullet to her. Her own thoughts were no better. No love or life or light, only blood and death and roses on her coffin. Bullet in the brainpan. Squish. Through all their prattle, she still heard the distant rumble of the oncoming storm. She felt the fierce electricity under her skin. There was no refuge in sleep. The Night Mares trampled through her head every time she drifted into even a light doze. "The storm is here, and he is Early", she murmured as she slipped off into the shadows and prepared for battle.

I want to love but it comes out wrong
I want to live but I don't belong
I close my eyes and I see
Blood and roses

Comments

[this-weirdness.livejournal.com]

I love this! It fits just right. I particularly enjoyed this: The Night Mares trampled through her head every time she drifted into even a light doze. Great imagery. :)

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much for reading and commenting! :)

[angelus2hot]

Well done!

Great River voice!

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thnak you so much for reading and commenting! :)

[deird1]

This is just lovely.

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much for the feedback! :)

[redrikki.livejournal.com]

I really like your River voice. It's just the right mix of metaphor and crazy. Excellent.

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for the feedback! I love River, and I miss Firefly! *sighs*

[ozma914.livejournal.com]

Well done, great look inside her tortured mind.

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much for the shiny feedback! :)

[(Anonymous)]

Hi,

this was really beautiful. I've struggled with mental health problems for more than thirty years and that ep was a particularly powerful moment for me. There were time when I was brought to think about some of the people I've known who haven't survived, and this brings back those bittersweet memories too. Extremely well done - I mean it!

Ray (kerkevik@btinternet.com)

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much for the personal and positive feedback. I really appreciate it.

Ally

[ubiquirk.livejournal.com]

Really great River voice - her mixture of metaphor and reality is spot on!

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much for the shiny feedback!

[spankulert.livejournal.com]

You did a very good job here portraying River's mangled confusion of a mind.

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much for the feedback!

[firefly124.livejournal.com]

Excellent River voice.

[alsunwunderland.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much! :)